The Criticism Sandwich- Remember Your Own Divinity

This past week has been a difficult one for me.  I developed cellulites on my shin after contacting poison ivy.  All of this came about doing what I love most, gardening.  Needless to say this has curtailed my normal routine and limited my activity.  For the first time in my life I’ve been to the doctor twice in the same week.

Unfortunately during this episode I abandoned my own practical wisdom.  Instead of practicing patience and slowing down I ranted at myself for my own carelessness in not attending to the first signs.  This derailed me and it wasn’t until last night watching an HBO special that I felt a shifting of my self-criticism.  The program is titled “Smile Pinky” and it tells the story of two children who are ostracized and ridiculed for their cleft lips.  Until they meet a social worker who travels from village to village locating children with this deformity. The documentary is the story of the smile train a non-profit organization dedicated to helping children in developing countries.  It follows these two remarkable children in their journey from isolation to acceptance. Experiencing someone else’s malady even through the medium of TV reminded me how important it is to see my feelings as just another thought and to recognize it. 

The criticism sandwich is a widely practiced managerial technique.  It’s simple: structure constructive criticism between praise, just like a sandwich with the praise on the top and bottom.   It’s candy coating the message but it is extremely effective in getting the desired result.  And who among us doesn’t like our bad medicine to be just a bit sweeter?

This week I needed to construct my own criticism sandwich. My self-criticism had no useful purpose. It only gave me more fuel for my own pity party. 

Watching the program humbled me and shifted my emotions away from myself, I experienced empathy and in doing so put things in the right perspective.

I intend to use the criticism sandwich next time I stumble into the unexpected.  Doing this will allow me to connect to the important things and move away from the trivial.   Instead of just being destructive in my self-analysis I can be positive and more productive.

Finding yourself in an unwanted situation is always difficult but knowing how to mange it will center you and pull you out of a slump.  So today make yourself a nice sandwich and be generous with the praise.

You can support the Smile Train at:

Smile Train - Dept. Mag.

PO Box 96231

Washington Dc 20090-6231